proxy: replace fsnotify with stat-poll watcher and add SIGHUP reload (#685)

The fsnotify-based config watcher does not work reliably when the config
file is bind-mounted into a Docker container as an individual file, and
mishandles k8s ConfigMap projections (atomically swapped symlinks).
Replace it with a small os.Stat-polling watcher and add SIGHUP as an
explicit reload signal.

- new proxy/configwatcher package: 2s os.Stat poller, follows symlinks,
  fires on mtime/size change and on missing -> present transitions
- SIGHUP triggers reload unconditionally (works without --watch-config)
  via the same ConfigFileChangedEvent pipeline so the UI sees identical
  state transitions
- watcher goroutine now exits cleanly on shutdown via a context
- drop github.com/fsnotify/fsnotify dependency

fixes #682

proxy/configwatcher/watcher.go

@@ -0,0 +1,85 @@
+// Package configwatcher provides a simple cross-platform file watcher based
+// on os.Stat polling. It works correctly inside Docker containers where the
+// config file is bind-mounted as an individual file, and for k8s ConfigMap
+// projections (which present the file as a symlink to an atomically swapped
+// target) — both cases where inotify-based watchers are unreliable.
+package configwatcher
+
+import (
+	"context"
+	"errors"
+	"io/fs"
+	"log"
+	"os"
+	"time"
+)
+
+const DefaultInterval = 2 * time.Second
+
+type Watcher struct {
+	Path     string
+	Interval time.Duration
+	OnChange func()
+}
+
+type snapshot struct {
+	exists  bool
+	modTime time.Time
+	size    int64
+}
+
+// Run blocks until ctx is canceled. It polls Path on Interval and invokes
+// OnChange whenever the file's modification time or size changes, or when
+// the file reappears after being missing. The baseline poll establishes
+// initial state and does not fire OnChange.
+func (w *Watcher) Run(ctx context.Context) {
+	interval := w.Interval
+	if interval <= 0 {
+		interval = DefaultInterval
+	}
+
+	prev := stat(w.Path)
+
+	ticker := time.NewTicker(interval)
+	defer ticker.Stop()
+
+	for {
+		select {
+		case <-ctx.Done():
+			return
+		case <-ticker.C:
+			cur := stat(w.Path)
+			if changed(prev, cur) && w.OnChange != nil {
+				w.OnChange()
+			}
+			prev = cur
+		}
+	}
+}
+
+func stat(path string) snapshot {
+	fi, err := os.Stat(path)
+	if err != nil {
+		if !errors.Is(err, fs.ErrNotExist) {
+			log.Printf("configwatcher: stat %s: %v", path, err)
+		}
+		return snapshot{}
+	}
+	return snapshot{
+		exists:  true,
+		modTime: fi.ModTime(),
+		size:    fi.Size(),
+	}
+}
+
+func changed(prev, cur snapshot) bool {
+	// Present → missing: stay quiet (likely a transient rename-style write).
+	// Missing → present: fire so we reload as soon as the file comes back.
+	if !cur.exists {
+		return false
+	}
+	if !prev.exists {
+		return true
+	}
+	return !prev.modTime.Equal(cur.modTime) || prev.size != cur.size
+}